About Recent Entries

Farewell, My Half-Blood Prince Jan. 14th, 2016 @ 08:42 pm
Today began with a note of shock, and then a subtle ache. As many others are fandom are saying - I may not have met him, but I was impacted - and inspired - by the roles he played, and the man he was. He was an actor who, by and large, refused to let his celebrity corrupt him. He was a role model to the aspiring; he was approachable, friendly, generous, and led by his heart. And he was, despite the roles he often enjoyed, a good man through.

I will miss, as will everyone, his iconic voice, the charisma he brought to his characters, the depth he brought to our fandom's favorite villain. I will miss looking forward to each new movie he's in, and I hope that his heart, the advice and the courage he gave many just by being himself, will continue to reach others through the lives of those he touched. That - as much as his acting - are his legacies to the world left behind.

I'd meant this to be a photo manipulation to celebrate Snape's birthday on January 9th. I was busy at the time, so instead it is being posted today - 14 January 2016 - the day the half-blood prince of the muggle world, Alan Rickman, died. He will be missed, for far more than the role of Severus Snape.

May do some further editing at a later time to fix some contrasts and whatnot, but I wanted to get this posted today, while I quietly brood over the losses 2016 has already brought with it. Image is work-safe, but has a younger Severus Snape, sans shirt.


My Half-Blood Prince )
Current Mood: melancholy

NaNoWriMo 2015, Anyone? Nov. 5th, 2015 @ 04:15 pm
I am doing Harry Potter fanfic for NaNoWriMo this year. I'm in a chatroom for word wars, but it's an all ages group so I can't really talk about what I'm writing (you know me and smut!). I'm wondering if there are any other folks in HP doing fanfic for NaNoWriMo and if we could cheer each other on?

I'm not asking for someone to read it, or like the same pairings (though occasional plot help may be requested). But someone I can talk smut with, and HP, would definitely be appreciated!

And mostly, encouragement (both ways). Because 50k in a month can be HARD to plow through. Get it? Hard, plow? Oh, never mind.... :X

So, anyone? :)

HALP Sep. 16th, 2015 @ 04:07 pm
The end of the summer ended up hairier than usual due to having to temporarily relocate and a bunch of other things, all with short notice. Which meant I didn't have much time to think about fandom until now, and I discover I've missed signups for everything I was stalking. UGH.

If there are HP fests/exchanges for the winter season still open for signups, can people point me to them? I know of Hoggywarty taking signups right now, but that's the only one. STILL can't believe I missed Smuttyclause signups, I've done that for something like 5 years in a row :(

Jan. 12th, 2013 @ 12:24 am
I am so pissed off with one corner of fandom right now I can't think straight.

Remember Me? Oct. 7th, 2012 @ 07:18 pm

Believe it or not, I am still active in fandom - quietly active, but active nonetheless. Usually via the Snupin Drabble nights, or more infrequently, the HD Chatzy room. I write with people over IM, too - my preferred route.

I've not really been logging into LJ and IJ, mostly because I forget, mostly because when possible I keep in touch with people over IM/Yahoo/MSN/Gchat/IRC etc, and I'd HOPE they'd tell me when they post something they'd like me to see?!?

It's frustrating when people stop logging in and I have no idea what happened to them. Maybe it's just me being a recluse and making too much of internet friends, but I tend to fret about them.

Usually, I have friends who poke me about fests and whatnot, but this year only two did. Sucks....but there it is. I hadn't thought I'd be doing any at all, to be honest, what with the Huge Freaking List of Doom. The two fests I AM doing shouldn't prove too onerous, so I was considering something else. I have something like 30+ Snupin ficlets (500-5,000 words) from 'drabble' night that need to be finished, polished, and posted.

Except, it's really hard to dredge up the enthusiasm to do the finishing/editing/posting when I can read them just fine from my gdocs folder. So the 'write it for yourself' motivation doesn't really count in this case. That might motivate me to FINISH the unfinished fics, but it sure won't goad me to post them. I usually like doing exchanges because the idea of getting a fic in return is a great incentive to produce. Comments, too. I churn out commissions because - obviously - money, heh. Incentive is a lovely thing.

So what makes you slog through the polishing and posting phase if you don't have the incentives? What works for ya'll? I'd LIKE to post them - but it doesn't seem worth the effort sometimes. Zzzz.....

On a more random note - ironically, few of the Snupin ficlets are actual darkfic, out of deference to the comm XD Some of them are even - GASP - fluffy D: Imagine that!!

My Insane To-Do List May. 3rd, 2012 @ 05:12 pm
I am trying to finish projects, and I'm not letting myself take on new ones. Like, ever. Seriously. Fandom is eating my brain.

But there are so many WIPS in my folder it's ridiculous, so I'm trying to knock those off one by one. Some are massive and may never be finished. Many will be, I hope. But you can see what's in the works, and maybe prod me to finish - chances are, if someone bugs me enough to finish something, I'll switch to that :)

Click for Insane List! )

So, uh. Cheerleaders? D:

Just a little PSA Dec. 3rd, 2011 @ 01:54 pm
Dear people who have written for me in exchanges or used my prompts in fests:

I will comment, never fear. I haven't forgotten. I just don't believe I get the luxury of reading until my own exchange fics are done. I am CLOSE, but not yet there.

And I very much need a full time beta. V_V

More on My Life In This Stupid Bloody City Oct. 17th, 2011 @ 04:02 pm
Around 9 pm, someone knocked on the front door, the husband went to the door, I turned on the porch light. He opened the door, said "How can I help you - " and there were two black men on the porch, the one in front had a weapon of some kind - whether real or just paintball or something, I dunno.

But they said "Get inside - " and tried to push inside, the husband slammed the door and they jammed the door open with the rifle or whatever it was. I heard there was scuffling and came running, and did the only thing I could think of - screamed, as loud and shrill as I could.

Heh, I'm always quiet and hate screaming, even on roller coasters, and I've never done high pitched or shrill screaming. I'd kinda wondered if I even *could*.

At least they ran when I screamed. We got the door shut and locked and bolted again, and called the police.

Um, seriously....the only officer who's been ice at ALL was the first one, where they'd just tried to open the window with the AC in it! The promised detective from the second break-in never showed, and with this one the police half-acted like we were hiding something in the house the criminals wanted!

Then they acted scornful that we'd just shut and bolted the door instead of trying to get a good look at them, and then tried to convince us the gun was likely a paintball gun and not a 'real weapon." Erm, IMHO, if someone has something metal and dangerous looking ad tries to force themselves into your house, it's a bloody weapon!

And when I asked what we SHOULD do in a situation like that, he said "Don't answer the door if you don't know who it is."

.....Um, right, cause that went so smashingly well LAST time. 'Smashingly' being the key word, considering they consider not opening the door an invitation to break DOWN the door!

I told him this, and he said "Well, call 911 when that happens."

So I told him about the stupid bint who seemed sure it was the Power Company trying to get in.

He had no response and no advice for that, just a kind of 'meh, well then it's your problem then." He didn't say there'd be a detective coming around this time, just said they'd patrol this area more.

We decided to pack and stay with the inlaws at least a day or two, because we were both in a state of shock - I was visibly and violently shaking for several hours afterwords. We were done packing anything of value to us - computers, important papers, clothes, the cat, etc - by one AM.

And despite checking the road often, I never once saw a police car pass through.

Why is it, the worse the situation gets, the more the police seem to do less?

I'm terrified of going back there, but I know we have to eventually. But we're kind of strapped on options. I badly need work, because we can't AFFORD anywhere else without two incomes. And selling the house with that kind of crime record is going to be a nightmare. The house next to us has been trashed several times.

What is WRONG with this stupid freakin' city???

Breaking and Entering Sep. 29th, 2011 @ 02:05 pm
Less than a week til my 30th birthday, and my best and only good friend in this bloody city is moving away. The day before my birthday.

Nothin' like having no friends to celebrate with.

And if that wasn't enough - noooooo, someone has to try to break in. What IS it about this grotty, illiterate city that makes people think not answering the door is an invitation to break down the door and enter? While I'm IN THE HOUSE, no less?

And that it's the second time IN SIX MONTHS?!?

Also, when I called 911, the asked me "If I was sure it wasn't the local power company". Um, why, is it NORMAL for power companies to batter down the door without announcing themselves? Or to just break in in general!?!?

I get so freakin' scared. I freeze up, all the things I know I SHOULD do, I don't do. I managed to shout 'hello' and they ran away. But really - twice in less than 6 months?!?!? I hate this stupid city and this stupid, ghetto neighborhood!

I want to move so badly it hurts, but the house would need so much repair work to get it sellable. :(

Pottermore! Sep. 27th, 2011 @ 05:18 am
I finally, finally, got an email inviting me to play in Pottermore. FINALLY. Woo! Not sure how to go about adding people, but my name is MirrorThorn64, so add me, or comment with your username to be added!

So far, the art is amazing, I'm loving the little bits of information. My wand made me seriously crack up - Ebony and Unicorn Hair, 10 3/4 inches, rigid. Apparently, I see the world in black and white and am very unflexible about this? XD

Still, I was glad to not have maple or - or hornbeam, which just sounds weird! And I'm distinctly amused by the whole black/white thing.

And then I got to the house sorting. I was all set for Ravenclaw. Or Hufflepuff, maybe. I'm not ambitious or particularly cunning, and I absolutely love being mediocre - best way to avoid attention! I'm a coward and totally willing to admit it. I do value friends fiercely, and I love to learn - so imagine my surprise when I ended up in -


Yep. Color me surprised. The common room is so creepy. T_T

Raaaaaaaaaaaaaain~ Aug. 6th, 2011 @ 05:10 pm
brief Post on where I've been all this past week. At the 'ripe old age' of thirty, I went to my first concert!

Actually, I went to Kingdom Bound, if any of you know what that is. I shared a campsite with my inlaws for a week, normal camping, except in the evenings instead of campfires, we went to concerts. I'm STILL squee-ing over seeing Petra live - they were THE rock band of my childhood. It feels very nostalgic to see them, even if 80's rock isn't my thing anymore :P

The only downside to camping is that it POURED. Heavy rain and thunder pretty much every night we were there bar one, and it frequently rained during the day, too. Enough rain that a lot of sites flooded - we were halfway up a hill so we didn't flood, but we were in the middle of a river it seemed - all that rain rushing downhill!

I still feel soggy, and I think the rain followed me *home* - it's been raining all day today, too. Lend me some sunshine, will you folks?

Anyway, now that I'm home and don't have nosy inlaws reading over my shoulder - back to writing I go!

(Oh, and one of the guitarists I saw in concert TOTALLY looked like Snape. I forget who it was, though T_T)

Pottermore Frustrations~ Aug. 6th, 2011 @ 01:23 pm
Considering I've been stalking Pottermore since I heard about it, and then again since I got back from camp and saw the magic Quill early signups, and then started obsessively refreshing the separate window set aside for just that - and that when the questions came up, and I followed directions, it only took me to the movie site ad nauseum until registrations closed, it is SUPER frustrating to see so many folks on my Flist got in when they 'weren't really interested, but were curious'. Could you maybe just say "Hey, I got into Pottermore!" and leave it at that?


It'll be a long wait til October. I'll have to fill the space writing for fests, maybe.

News, Updates, Organisation Jul. 23rd, 2011 @ 07:05 am
Sorry I've been so ghastly quiet... )

Fests & Exchanges I'm tracking for this winter/fall (an attempt to organise myself!):

(Winter Fests)
Snapely Holidays - a definite must!
HP Yule Balls
Smutty Claus
Harry/Draco Holidays
Harry Holidays
Kinky Kristmas
Hoggywarty Christmas

Prisoner Fest - is this going to run again?
HP Darkfest - maybe? Have the fic from last year, unsure if they'll want it
HP Kink Meme
Halloween Creaturefest
HP Zombie Fest - drool over the bunny I have
HP Rentboy, PornStar, Escort, and Strippers Fest - must submit prompts...when I get bunnies
HP Kink-n-Squick

Dead or Unknown? Any info on these?
HP Holiday Gen
Snarry Hols

Just to keep track of:

On a completely random note: the dollar store has sugar free cookies. And they even taste good! This makes me a very happy girl, and goes very well with the treadmill I inherited from Papa.

Discouragement Jun. 10th, 2011 @ 09:44 am
I'm starting to think I must be a pretty crap writer/artist.

No, it's not just the usual starving-artist-inferiority complex, nor me begging for comments. I haven't posted much lately, after all.

But. This past winter - 5 months gone and then some - I had not one, but TWO gifts I produced get ignored by their recipient. One art, one fic. I can - kinda - understand the fic recipient not responding. Maybe it was just a bad fic, it was hard to write. But the art? I thought the art was good. Some of my better art, really. And the person's been online, talked to people, been in chat, joined other fests, even been reminded she has a gift she didn't comment on, and -


And then there's the person I'd bounce all my Snarry plotbunnies off of. Who I wrote a lovely long (well, long being more than 10,000 words) smutty fic for. And she hasn't been around long enough to read it. Her IM is always up; I've messaged her over the course of TWO MONTHS, and I'm either being ignored or she thinks my fic is really crappy and just doesn't want to say. Or she's had another emergency, but - two months?!?!?

And I can't seem to keep a muse anymore. I need people to bounce ideas off of, talk through plotbunnies, send and share snippets of writing with. I just can't seem to write without that second-person perspective and enthusiasm. Witohut it, I double-guess and naysay myself into the ground. Of course, finding a muse who's interested in a wide variety of pairings (especially Snape-centric ones), both het and slash, a vast number of kinks, and especially dark fic of all flavours - and last of all, someone who is often online via AIM, MSN, Yahoo, IRC, ICQ, Google chat or any other messaging client.

I would insist on being difficult.

So yea, kinda bummed and discouraged in general.
Current Mood: discouraged
Other entries
» Fic: Unwitting Voyeur (NC17)
Title: Unwitting Voyeur
Rating: NC17
Word Count: ~1,500
Kinks: voyeurism, wanking, fingering, dildo-ing
Warnings: none! this is positively fluffy!
Summary: Remus checks on Snape in his own quarters, and sees something he shouldn't.
Notes: 'drabble' written for the snupin chat. Got a little too into it!
Disclaimer: If they were mine, I wouldn't have to write porn to cheer myself up. I'd be writing porn because it's porn. :3

He really shouldn't be watching.
» Happy Halloween!
Hope everyone's having a fun one!

Husband's studying for the A+ over, he's working on getting my computer fixed. Currently I can't even use his old desktop because he's using it to clone my damaged harddrive on to, so he has a backup if files are lost. T_T

I was hoping to do a nice little halloween sketch for you, but alas, this was not to be. You'll have to make do with a piece from last winter - everyone loves vampire!Snape, right? :P


large picture under here )

I slept almost all day, trying to shake a new head cold. Last thing I want is to start November off with a cold.

» Plugging Away, and a Request
Things are still not all well here in computer-land. Used a program to root out viruses in the registry, and unknowingly it deleted some sort of system file - now windows will not boot at all! AUGH.

So currently I'm using the husband's old computer since it appears the ONLY CD my computer will accept is the original. Here's the problem: we have the case, we have the key. We just can't find the bloody CD! It's making me mighty fed up with Windows.

Anyway, art is pretty much not happening at the moment. Husband doesn't have photoshop on this computer, and I really don't know if I can switch my activation from one comp to another and back - even if I could, this comp is OLD, and wouldn't handle any large r memory-intensive psds, etc. Nor can I use my 3D software - oh, I can install the *software* but I don't think it'd be up to intensive renders. And all my models are on the borked drive. AUGH.

So, I'm working on writing. I wish I wasn't so SLOW at writing!! Art is so much easier. I can get into the zone, fling myself into it, and 10 hours later have something I like. Writing, I write for hours, come out with 2k that will have to be rewritten anyway. *sob*

This month's D_D is at 1.5k so far, and likely less than 1/3 done. Eep!

Darkfest - fic #1 written. Fic #2 1/2 written. Still wibbling about whether to submit fic #3 at all.

I am contemplating Valensmut again this year. May or may not happen. Shall see. Thoughts?

Am trying to focus on pacing more than usual. Being limited to writing is going to make me burn out more than usual.

The cure to burnout, for me, is to take a day and settle in and chew my way through a nice, long fanfic. Here's where the request comes in:

Please rec me fic that's 50k or longer?

It can be AU, AR, Canon, next gen, slash, het, rarepairs, gen, fluff, horror, romance, adventure. Fic with Snape featuring prominently would take the cake, but any characters shall do! The only qualifier is that they be complete stories.

Everyone who recs fics of 100k or longer that I haven't read before shall get a drabble with the characters and pairing of your choice!***

I'm looking for long fics/series because despite my snail's pace in writing, my reading is fast (somewhere around 60-100 pages an hour), so I like something that will keep my attention all afternoon. :)

***Qualifier on this: it's easy to go to and search for massively long fics. But there are a ton of really long, crappy fics. It won't do me any good if I can't stand reading it past the first chapter :(
» Stresses up the Wazzoo
I'll try to keep my moaning succinct.

Good things:
1) Hot water heater is replaced. Hot showers is definitely good, because it's gotten cold out!
2) Cough is pretty much gone and allergy meds are helping a lot
3) Leaking gas meter is fixed
4) friends got together for a birthday party
5) Electric blanket is a lovely thing

Bad things:
1) douche at a LAN party poured water over the hubby's computer. Several hundred dollars in parts damaged. Hoping to bully the imbecile into paying.
2) MY computer is fritzed. The virus we wrestled into sort-of-dormancy is now active. It prevents Chrome from accessing the internet, prevents Mozilla from opening period, and freezes the computer if IE is opened. It's hogging most of the system resources, and freezes if the computer's on for too long anyway. Needless to say, I'm looking at a wipe and reinstall. I'm working on backing up my files, but I'm told by those in the know I may have to reinstall several times with in depth scans in between to make sure I've gotten rid of all traces. UGH. So right now I have no desktop, which means no art.
3) Gas heater ignition and dryer are both leaking gas. Thanks to the water heater we can't afford a new dryer. We need to get a technician in to look at the heater.
4) Bug is going around friends. They came to my party sick, and left early. :(
5) There's a mouse in the bedroom, skittering around. I can't sleep when I hear it! Our cat tries to catch it, but...well, the keyword is 'try'. I've been pretty scant on sleep lately.

Writing is difficult. I have plots and bunnies, but every time I get somewhere something sets me back. Like the fact that though it should, Word Doc is not saving progress when a file crashes - and I can't write in google docs when I can't access internet. I haven't been seeing my normal muses online lately, and I'm trying to adjust to writing on the laptop again. I'm really frustrated about missing out on posting at D_D *again* when I had art AND a bunch written - I'm so sick of this computer crap!!! Can I sic Moldiepants on the hackers? Or Bella? PLEEEEZEEEE?
» Long Absence Much?
Last I posted I was recruiting for Prisonerfest, and now they're well under way posting. So what's been going on with me, eh?

Long story short - a lot of being sick, high blood sugar problems, trying to work, excercise more, things breaking (first the kitchen sink, then the hotwater heater, resulting in almost a month of no hot water in the house). Inlaw issues, traveling to visit my parents for the twice-a-year visit, dragged on a camping trip with the inlaws, more being sick (likely due to torrential rain during said camping).

and, of course, computer issues. My computer's been infected with that !@#$%&*! 'Security Suite' trojan thing, and no, before you ask, I did NOT click on anything - it apparently installed itself from an ad. AUGH. It's gotten harder to remove - two computer specialists spent a whole day with my computer, and managed to get some of it fixed and restore at least a SEMBLANCE of functionality, but the rest - well. I apparently need to re-install windows 'cause it's that mucked up.

Too bad I have no bloody idea where the install discs are.

All the frustration has me rather bloody minded, so I'm enjoying Prisonerfest and writing for Darkfest. Yea, it's good to write for myself for a change :)
» Sunporn, Prisonerfest, HP_SSC, and to-do's
Back to not-reading fests and whatnot, 'cause I'm buckling down on writing Sunporn. I HOPE I can get it done in time; if not, there's always art, aye?? Because so far, a small bunny became this huge plot. I really need to kill off these bunnies!! T_T Have a bit of an extension and I'm buckling down, so I'll hopefully get to start catching up on what's being posted in another week or two.

Once the Sunporn is done, the focus is next month's D_D, which I think is going to be a great deal of fun and possibly the smuttiest thing I've written, if the squeeing of my muse is any indication. Oh dear! *g*

Need to post my signup for Prisonerfest. Today, me thinks, before I forget all together. If you like noncon, or dubcon, or angst, or prison!fic, blackmail, PoW stories, or kidnapping (adult-napping?) in the HP verse, or anything you can squeeze into those margins, you should trundle over and squeeze in a signup. Have a locked-in-with-a-werewolf bunny? Captured-by-Death-Eaters bunny? Unjustly-locked-in-Azkaban bunny? Forced-to-betray-your-friends bunny? Prisoner-in-Malfoy-Manor fic? Trapped-in-the-Shrieking-Shack bunny?

If you like angst, horror, hurt/comfort, or any other genres that can accomodate the above, this might be the fest for you. :3

And I need to contact the writer I'm supposed to illustrate for in the Neville Big Bang (Neville love! Nearly as dearly as Sneville love and Snape love! XD Now I have to just get a feel for my virtual Neville... HALP!)

And I'm trying to fend off a very rabid plot bunny for the HP_SSC fest, a very naughty Snupin Bunny, which is A Very Annoying Thing, but at the same time it might be fun to piss off some of the people in that ship (some lovelies excluded, of course!). And since it's a fest and not an exchange, I can write the kinks I want :3

Still need to finish my personal projects - Snarrytales and Pain & Punishment at the top of those.

And I'm having WAY too much fun with my Severus Sighs Grand Challenge. XD

Hubby thinks I'm spending too much time in fandom....could he be right??? Nahhhh....

Thanks for the advice/comments on my prior post, I locked it private after getting feedback, thanks!
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